Today was the government holiday for Independence Day. That’s why all the banks and government buildings were closed, and why the mail didn’t run. For some reason, the garage I go to was closed as well, but I don’t blame ’em.
Where to start. Just because I think it’s funny, there was a rash of fireworks exploding across the country yesterday. “But Matt,” you say, “that’s what people do on the Fourth of July, blow up fireworks.” Yes, that’s true, but there was a spate of fireworks going off without anyone actively setting them off, usually in big collections. All over the country, celebrations were marred when a night’s worth of fireworks just blew the hell up, often taking a rental truck or two with them.
To be fair, some were caused by rascally teens, but quite a number just went up and no one’s sure why. It could’ve been because it’s been so goddamn hot all over the country, especially in the Pacific Northwest. It should be noted your average firecracker needs some sort of ignition to set it off, so having a pack in your car on a hot day probably isn’t a danger. That being said, large bunches of them stored in a dry spot won’t take much for a spark to happen. That’s just physics.
This all comes a couple of days after the LAPD set off something like 5,000 pounds of illegal fireworks in a neighborhood, blowing the hell out of the bomb disposal truck. They tried to blame it on anyone but themselves, but regardless it resulted in 17 injured. It’s also wrapped up in stroppy being thrown by 2024 nominee for the Republican Party’s run for the President Kristen Noem of South Dakota as a part of her side gig as governor of that lovely state. Last year, they were allowed by the Former Guy to hold a fireworks display at Mount Rushmore for the first time since 2009.
It’s been on hold for a number of reasons, mainly because a drought has made the area dangerously dry and no one wants to see it go up. The permit was denied this year and Noem lost a case in federal court, citing wildfire risks and construction in the area. Because she’s got nothing else to worry about, Noem cried about hypocrisy over the fireworks display at the White House.
Moving on, Tropical Storm Else had gotten up to a bona fide Category One hurricane but calmed down a bit going over Haiti. It’s currently making its way across Cuba and meteorologists say it could pick up steam and turn into something fierce once it hits open water again. As of right now, it’s predicted to go right up Florida and is already hitting the Sunshine State with bands of rain. This is one of the reasons Miami officials sped up the timeline on demolishing the condominium in Surfside that collapsed a week ago this past Thursday. After the demolition, three more bodies were found in the rubble, bringing the verified count up to 27. One hundred and seventeen people are still unaccounted for.
Dear Y'all 