Saturday, October 12, 2019

Well, I’m not in the mood for this, but as I’m wired & inspired for one of the last few times for a while, we might as well knock this out.

But don’t get it twisted, I’m not in the foul frame of mind I was in yesterday. One of the things about my depression is that when I get around to recognizing it for what it is, it tends to lighten up in relatively short order. I don’t know if that’s a good thing or a bad thing, but it is a thing. Still didn’t sleep for shit, but I woke up in a… well, let’s just say it wasn’t as foul as yesterday.

Still a little touchy, but it’s the touchy I can deal with. I still don’t feel like diving too deep into the News, but I did greet the morning with a bit more of a snarl and bite. What a friend of mine once referred to as “the good kind of mean”. I can live with that, mainly because it means I’m living. I don’t like it and I’d change it if I could, but I seem to work best when I’m a bit pissed off. “Curmudgeonly,” I’ve been called with some affection, but I don’t feel like keeping it up 24/7. Lot of work.

Anyhow. It’s been an okay day. Momma’s spending time with childhood friends after spending the day at my cousin’s grandbaby’s birthday. She needs that; an older lady from the community, someone she’s known since she was a girl, passed this morning after a long illness. After taking care of my father, my grandmother, and one of my uncles as they died, Momma still feels guilty she didn’t do more for this family. They understand, though, and appreciate what she’s given, just like she did when they couldn’t visit every day when Daddy was dying. That’s how life goes, but there’s always grandbabies.

So I’ve had the Hill to myself and knocked all but probably the last bit of Mendocino. There isn’t enough to be worth trying to save, I’ll probably burn it up for the benediction and move on. I’m not comfortable with getting it in the mail and I can’t see myself driving to a Free State again any time soon. I will probably wind up in either Athens or New Orleans before the years out, but I am just really not down with travelling. I still like it but I’m still tired.

You know, I was about to write how this was a particularly wild weekend, in re: Americna politics and what all, but that really doesn’t fly anymore. Not really, not when damn near every day is weird and more unsettling than the previous. Perhaps the LHC shook something loose, perhaps it didn’t. That I can’t convince myself one way or another isn’t a comfortable feeling at all.

Last couple of days, Trump has held a couple of his weird revival show-slash-stand-up rallies and the Democratic candidates, who stubbornly refuse to give a tin shit about your feelings, held a town hall on LGBT issues. In what’s becoming a pleasant norm for these sort of shindigs, some candidates said some things that got conservatives shitting themselves in rage. They have lost their goddamn minds that Elizabeth Warren had a sassypants answer to dumbest of dumbass questions regarding gay marriage. I think the guy who was asking the question was sort of into it, but every knuckle-dragging fenderhead who’s still worried someone will laugh at his dick, including an actual “Jerry Sandusky Truther,” clutches the collective pearls.

There is a bit of centrist-NPR-Whole-Foods-But-The-Schools-Are-Safer-And-Better liberals mewling, the same people who think “identity politics is killing the left” isn’t a rock-stupid thing to say, but maybe a bit less than previously. I’m not giving it odds, but it’s something to think about, isn’t it? That the general responsible from everyone left of Shepard Smith basically just offered some aloe for that burn, but otherwise tough titty.

I don’t think I can be 100 percent on this, but I seriously doubt there are too many folks on the fence about Donald Trump. The cult is ride or die, and the bulk of pre-Trump Republicans will basically pretend they won’t until they do. At best, they all stay at home out of some the same stupid sense of smug superiority that’s a mark of American politics as a whole. Politicians don’t care if you vote. Someone will and if you can’t be bothered they can’t be expected to believe you really give a shit.

The lines are drawn as far as that goes. I read somewhere that one in five registered Republicans favor someone else than Trump, though it didn’t say anything about the three goobers also going for the nomination. That is 20 percent against, but for 80 percent it’s still damn the torpedoes. They tell us this, it’d do to believe them.

Of course, the corporate media has to justify its bloat and indolence, so we’ve had to hear some goofy wingnut horse pucky this week. They’re convinced Beto O’Rourke’s going to kick their door in, and that Tulsi Gabbard and Marianne Williamson believe they have way more followers, they’re just scared of the booger man. I think they’re more pissed off that Warren keeps giving them the finger than they’re actually concerned she thinks women in the ’70s could’ve been fired for getting pregnant, the silly little things.

Nobody pays attention to poor ol’ Corey Booker, though. There’s another debate coming up soon and the hide’s getting scarce, I can’t see the filed not thinning out. Just for me, I think O’Rourke should run for Texas senator and Andrew Yang should find something more useful to do with his money than not come within a mile of the White House. I’m sure Booker, Julian Castro and, maybe, Kamala Harris could refocus their considerable ability in different directions. I hope Joe Biden stays in it long enough so that Trumps nonstop screeching about them strips the final dingleberries still holding on, if only because they’re embarrassed at how bad he’s doing it.

That’s just for me, though. Impeachment rolls on, the faithful are girding their loins, and the Left smells blood in the water. Shit could still go weird. Even after the cracks had shown in Iraq, Bush Junior was re-elected the highest turnout in decades. It’s entirely possible we’ve gotten off beat at the quantum level.

Okay. I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I’ve taken to posting these things in the late afternoon and then spending the evening updating and adding links. That’s just how it is. I still haven’t asked for advice from anyone who might know something, but I can’t think of just what I would ask them, so it’s probably for the best.

I’ve had a couple more ideals for possible fiction, but nothing lights me up. I finished the Liu Cixin collection (and it comes recommended) and the Apocalypse-inspired collection And Hell Followed (it does not). I’m settling into a rather nice Weird Western, Drovers And Demons: A Weird Tale of the Old West. Unfortunately it seems to be first in a series, so we’ll see how that goes.

All righty then.

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